2.29.2008

I'm feeling unloved

At this very minute, I'm feeling very insignificant, unappreciated, and unneeded. And not by my children either, it's my husband. He's been off work for almost a month now, and this situation isn't working. I've tried to give him time to rest and get used to things, but he doesn't seem to be getting into any kind of routine. Well, he has if you count laying around all day, playing on the computer, and things like that to be a routine. I know I'm not working either, but I do go to school twice a week, and he seems to think that I only have to do things for school when I am at school. I don't have any breaks at school though, so all of my homework and studying has to be done at home. He doesn't clean the house at all when I'm gone. Sometimes he'll start doing laundry, or pick up the living room, but he just generally straightens up if he does anything, not really cleaning. My house is more of a wreck now than it was when he was still working, I guess because he's here all the time to mess it up.

To make things worse, it's like he's this huge social butterfly now. His phone is constantly ringing, and he's talking to this person or that one, or texting with his sister, or one of his friends or his sister is over here, or he has to run over to someone's house for something. On Wednesday, when I got home from school he was on the phone, and literally, until about 10 that night, he was either on the phone with someone, or someone was over here. We, or I guess I should say he, had three visitors that evening/night. He barely spoke to me that whole time, he was too busy. Then he decided he'd sit down with me at 10:30 and try to chat me up. Well, fuck you buddy. You haven't had the time of day for me all this time. What, I'm only good enough to hang out with when there's no one else around?

Last night was Shelby's birthday, and shortly before we were getting ready to cut the cake, his aunt called and he had to rush out to her house real quick. So, needless to say, we are fighting right now. :/ I just know he's going to have to get over this shit because I'm not going to be put on the back burner for too long. Why even be here if he doesn't have time or the inclination to interact with us and spend time with us?

4 comments:

Pez said...

Paula, I am so sorry. Besides FPT, Darrell needs a good talking to. He needs to know he needs to pull his weight around the house since he is home and you are busy with school. That was unacceptable that he had to run out before Shelby's cake had been cut (happy belated birthday to Shelby).

I hope things get better soon. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Anonymous said...

{{{Paula}}}
Snapper

Paula said...

Thanks, you guys. We did some talking and had a very good weekend with each other and the kids. The weather has been beautiful and we've been outside. Last night, we turned off the cell phones and the ringer on the house phone off and watched movies until very late!

He also told me that he has been feeling the same way at times, especially when I'm so busy with schoolwork, and I do understand that (even though homework is something I HAVE to do). I guess we both need to work on better communication.

Anonymous said...

Awww...that's what I like to hear. Sounds like a good night.

Snapper